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Critical Feedback and Performance Conversations

This is one of the most challenging and inevitable things you face as an Engineering Manager. Usually, it's due to performance or behavioral elements. The following are notes that I've been gathering for those hard occasions to prepare myself.

Engineering for the Rest of Us by Sarah Drasner​

Are you giving feedback to truly see this team member grow? What's the best possible scenario that can come out of this? If the answer is, "They have better tools for communicating with their coworkers," then you are probably coming from a place of care.

If on the other hand, the answer is "Because I don't like X," you may have some more digging to do within yourself even before talking to the other person. Why does X upset you? Is it a you thing or a them thing? If it's a you thing, is it something you should try to work out on your own? Feedback is a tool and can be weaponized for our own insecurities and blind spots if we're not thinking things through.
[19]

There are, of course, times when you don't have a choice but to deliver hard feedback. If someone on your team has an HR violation for instance, you need to be more firm with expectations... Sometimes if a person is going harm to one or more people, it may have legal implications that you are not aware of.

There may be situations where many people on the team are reporting having issues with the same person. In those situations, feedback is less optional. You have to ensure a good working environment for the greater group, and that involves working with an individual in an actionable way to understand the impact of their behavior on the team.

During the call... be as specific as possible because you can unpack what happened, and why there was a negative impact. Here's an example of such questions...:

  • What were you trying to say?
  • How do you think this sounded to the person who heard it?
  • Is this the impact you were aiming for?
  • How could this go better next time?

Note that you're allowing them to talk through their perspective of the events, while also soliciting them to think through what the other person might be thinking and feeling. But if issues keep happening... even after work shopping and providing feedback, you need to work on a growth document together with specific expectations on what they need to improve on. A next phase could be a PIP (performance improvement plan) with the people team, and then eventually seperating ways. You're in charge of a system of people, you need to make sure you are taking the wider group's health and safety seriously

If you have a conversation that goes off the rails, I'd suggest spending a bit of time after you're off the call to write down what you think happened... Write through the facts of what happened... and then write through feelings of what went poorly and what could've been better. It helps to check in with the facts seperately because our human brains can sometimes try to protect us by amplifying a particular version of the event [20]

The Manager's Path by Camille Fournier​

The following notes are for underperforming team members

  • Keep in mind: All companies have HR policies.
  • A standard process is the Performance Improvement Plan. This plan sets clear objectives the person must achieve within a time.
  • Every company is different; some may build a plan to create a turnaround. For others, the document is structured so they cannot achieve their goals in the allowed time; it's just a generous way of giving someone time to look for another job before being fired.
  • A basic rule of management is no surprises, especially bad surprises. Team members should receive clarity on expectations early, especially if the individual isn't meeting expectations; giving early feedback is critical.
  • When working on improvements, keep records, agree to a timeline, and have the individual agree in writing. Not only does it protect you legally, but it also helps treat your employees fairly.
  • Be careful whom you put on a plan. Most employees will see this formal warning as a sign that the organization is not a good fit for them and leave as quickly as possible.